oh my god LOL!

So I follow a lot of blogs around here and in one of them i found a review about the famous "Vernokia decides to Die" by Paulo Coelho. I have read the book on my computer ( which, btw, takes away almost ALL of the fun. I mean you cant smell the pages of ebooks or snuggle with them in your bed and it spoils your eyes to a great degree! And it has another disadvantage too - TCTS (read further to find out).). Anyway, I found ths book SO overrated! And short, and absolutely pointless!

But apparently, as I found out while reading that blog... I HAD ONLY READ HALF THE BOOK ! LMAO! I read that review I told you about and found out that SO much more happens! The Ebook I had was only half of the whole thing and THATS why i found it so hard to believe that it was the ending ! Bwhahahaha, isnt that funny?

Anyway, I have to find out good ebook sites !

Spoiler alert: For those who HAVE read this book, i ended at the part where Veronika wakes up to find herself in a mental hospital. I thought THAT was meant to teach her a lesson for tryin suicide! LOL i cant stop laughing.

Gotta go p33pz !

P.S. My braces will be the death of me. I couldnt eat/drink ANYTHING today because of this severe cut in my tongue (which has now been taken care of) . And not eating wouldnt have bothered me so much if I was the person I was ...er....till some days ago. But I'm tryin to put on weight these days {*watches half the female population faint*} and am feeling sorry right now about my poor little stomach :(

P.P.S SCHOOL SUCKS more than ever.

P.P.P.S : Did you guys watch the solar eclipse ?! Oh god, i so totally wanted to but it apparently wasnt goin to be as visible where i live! Bahness!

Anyway, cya guys :D

Now reading: NUFFIN! =[
Now listening to: Washin machine 0_O
Now wanting: stone cold attitude towards someone.

OOOOOUCHH!!!

my braces officially SUCK!

forget what i said about them being shiny and metallic and making my upper lip pout hence making it sexy!

every new day is the birth of a new type of pain at a new type of place in my mouth. right now i am in SO much pain it's hard to believe. AHHHHHHHHHHHH. @*@(@.....

worst part! i was fiddling with the wire cos it sort of made the pain go away and i snapped out the square metallic thing that they stick on ur teeth surface through which the wire passes. the wire is sticking out in midair right now {midair in my mouth, yeah its confusing}.

thats the 2nd square thingy coming off since i got them. GRRR. i hope this wont result into them being more horrible thn earlier o_O

whatever though....OUUUUCCCHHH!

random chain of random thoughts ...

I don’t know why I am the bitter person that I am. I honestly don’t want to be. I love people who are in love with life and who’re constantly upto one thing or the other. No scratch that. I am insanely jealous of those people who are like that. I mean that’s what life’s all about right? (not the jealousy, I mean being upto various activities). At least to me it is. The world is such a large place with so many great places to see, adventures to experience, feelings to…well, feel!, lessons to be learnt… how very unfortunate that most of us are stuck in pre destined forms of life created for them by their parents. No scratch “most of us”. I mean ME.

I dream of a world where every individual IS an individual in the very sense of the word. Where people live and let live. Unfortunately mine is a society where people seriously limit your freedom. My mom is the one who’s always imposing me with the idea that my image in the society is what matters the most in life. I know I must care for a reputation ( and yeah it’s not exactly like I want to be a pole dancer or anything). I just … wanna explore the world and see what those experiences make me. I wanna grow.. I’m just so terribly static right now. There are a lot of you out there who by the time they’re my age have been to a whole load of places, have met innumerable people and are just….on the go every minute.

Anyway, this started off as a post about my being a bitter person and it’s become something else. SEE, I cant even write properly. So there goes my chance at being a writer/editor/journalist. Not like I was hoping to be one anyway. I don’t think that’s what I want. I was just saying. Maybe I’m just random and cant think one thought at a time. Or maybe, as my English education right now isn’t going very well, it’s not my fault. Or maybe I’m a failure at one more thing. (writing something coherent!)

Anyway, so I am completely filled with hate. Every single thing in the universe will generate a sarcastic/ “who cares about how pretty/smart/awesome you are, I have enough problems of my own” type of response. GAH. I HATE HOW I HATE SO MUCH. And I sort of know the reason. See my life hasn’t actually been as … happy as an average person’s. Or maybe I’m just a being rotten, ungrateful prat. I don’t know.

Anyway, all this. It’s making me VERY anti social. There’s just absolutely nothing called security in me . I am surprised to find myself loved and actually wanted by people… (wanted, HAHA). Ahem, anyway.

So yeah. I hate people in general. They are dumb, conceited, stereotyped, are ready to lecture you about how you should do things/ the way you should think about things (FUCK YOU SO CALLED PATRIOTS) .. (this is from a recent experience), and are ever, ever ready to trample on your self esteem and derive great pleasure from it. And then going off to hunt for some bunnies.

All this may make me seem like a 6 year old girl who gets bullied everyday. I don’t. I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself. But that doesn’t make them any right-er.

GRR. I was SO different from this hateful person when I was smaller. Ignorance is bliss, shall we say? I was full of life and optimistic and NEVER EVER lost hope. I miss me. I give up these days. On everything.

Anyway, it’s about 2:30 and I have got school tomorrow. Don’t even get me started on that mental place. I feel suffocated there. Fucking shallow, dumb people in front of whom I smile my fake smile and they don’t even notice it. Or maybe they do but just not care. Yeah, should be the latter.

Mehh. Signing off.

15 reasons why you dont wanna be me

a series of unfortunate events has occured in the past 24 hours that makes me lose faith in humanity.

caution: this is not a very happy post. sod off if you dont like ungrateful teenagers whining.

1. my mom just lost her job. and why's that bad for me? because first off shes always been there for me cheering me up when i lost somehting and see her upset ( about something i agree she should be upset about) is not something i like.and it's not even her fault, they only took people from their own unit + 2 ppl who were in the firm for years (experince helps) she'd only joined last year so yeah.

and 2nd, well there's something i cant tell you. lets call it IFG. well, her losing her job resulted into IFG. and i HATE it.

2. people are being evil. i just came to know about the ending of a fab movie i was dying to see (it's not everyday I wanna see a movie, believe me.) and when i got mad at the person they just laughed and told me about another person who dies in the movie. -_- very funny. go develop a sense of humour before you face the world.

3. well, the sun. it was so awesoemly windy till 3:59 pm today. grey skies and a cool wind is the only weather yours truly likes, and so i was excited to actually step out of me house and go to coaching classes {3 hours of them, too. so u understand how being excited about them is a novelty}. anyway, at PRECISELY 4 o clock, the sun came out. not the dull, warmish sun that makes me think of hogwarts (go figure.) but HARSH, SIZZLING HOT sun that can make iron evaporate. even then i decided against beggin my parents not to go to coaching and went down to my garage only to find my cycle was punctured. badly.. another reason not to go. but i went up {AGAIN.} and told my dad and he decided to drop me by car. instead of letting me be.

4. a major end-of-the-term feast was going to take place on this website of harry potter. i had contributed to the preparation by spending hours on the net making graphics, composin playlists and what not. well i thought the feast was supposed to be on 27th july. WRONG. i checked out the website on 30th june only to note i'd missed all the fun 3 days ago. *(^#&*^#&$%^&#$%^#$^%#$

5. i can only tolerate parents bickering for so long.

6. my grandma. okie so you're gonna gasp and splutter but i do not like her invading my privacy. she intervenes in EVERYTHING.

7. my exams are only about 15 days away. hey wait thats almost half a month but whatever. 4 chapters of organic chemistry will be the death of me.

8. bad hair day today. coudlnt find my rubber band. took hours to tie hair into a ...whatever its called.

9. my jaw is paining. my braces have sharp needle points that hurt me at points i didnt even know existed.

10. my only friend in this town who helps me get through school is "sick" or so she says and therefore isnt coming to school..( it's awfuler than it sounds.)

11. did i actually reach the 10th point!?!?!?! reason enuff to be sad.

12. my internet is being a bastard today. orkut/facebook wont open so i'm making this list.

13===> is supposed to be haunted.

14. mom just told me to get my ass off the computer. orkut still hasnt opened.

15. i think i'll go now

now listening to: boom boom pow (i hate this song so much)
now reading: far from the madding crowd
now wanting: nirvana